Obituary: The Sad Passing Of Common Sense

[jaydee]

Would be funny if it wasn't true? Got this in an e-mail recently.

Today we mourn the passing of a beloved old friend,Common Sense, who
has been with us for many years. No one knows for sure how old he was since
his birth records were long ago lost in bureaucratic red tape. He will be
remembered as having cultivated such valuable lessons as knowing when to
come in out of the rain, why the early bird gets the worm, life isn't
always fair, and maybe it was my fault.


Common Sense lived by simple, sound financial policies (don't spend
more than you earn) and reliable parenting strategies (adults, not
children, are in charge). His health began to deteriorate rapidly when well
intentioned but overbearing regulations were set in place. Reports of a
six-year-old boy charged with sexual harassment for kissing a classmate;
teens suspended from school for using mouth wash after lunch; and a teacher
fired for reprimanding an unruly student, only worsened his condition.


Common Sense lost ground when parents attacked teachers for doing
the job they failed to do in disciplining their unruly children. It
declined even further when schools were required to get parental consent to
administer Panadol, sun lotion or a sticky plaster to a student; but, could
not inform the parents when a student became pregnant and wanted to have an
abortion.


Common sense lost the will to live as the Ten Commandments became
contraband; churches became businesses; and criminals received better
treatment than their victims.


Common Sense took a beating when you couldn't defend yourself from a
burglar in your own home and the burglar can sue you for assault. Common
Sense finally gave up the will to live after a woman failed to realize
that a steaming cup of coffee was hot. She spilled a little in her lap, and
was promptly awarded a huge settlement.


Common Sense was preceded in death by his parents, Truth and Trust;
his wife, Discretion; his daughter, Responsibility; and his son, Reason. He
is survived by three stepbrothers; I Know My Rights, Someone Else is to
Blame, and I'm A Victim. Not many attended his funeral because so few
realized he was gone. If you still remember him, pass this on. If not join
the majority and do nothing.