New daughter

[TheEagleCD]

Yeah, thanks for the update - and it's great to hear that she's home with you and your kids!
You're always in our hearts and minds.

TheEagleCD

[skirge01]

Brian... thanks so much for the update. You've definitely been in many people's thoughts and prayers for quite some time. We're all very happy to hear this great news from you, but nowhere near as happy as I'm sure you are!

[guandi]

Ker-Ching. Paypall credited 30-somthing dollars, (£20) i hope it helps

Get well soon Heather!!!

-Phil

[Brians256]

Originally Posted by guandi

Ker-Ching. Paypall credited 30-somthing dollars, (£20) i hope it helps

Get well soon Heather!!!

-Phil

Thank you, Phil. Maybe I'll get her some flowers. It's pretty frustrating and depressing for her right now. She's not used to having people tell her that it's not safe to do certain things (like driving, yikes!) and having people correct her when she uses a wrong word or when she needs to stop doing things over and over (look up perseverance, not the same thing as perserverance).

[nexxo]

The term you're looking for is "perseveration". It is a problem that can occur in the executive system of the brain (frontal lobes). It can show as repetetive action, or difficulty in moving on to another action (even though the person is quite aware of this). Perseveration can also show in thinking (difficulty in disengaging from an idea or train of thought) or choice of words.

This early on, I'd expect this to improve with time. Meanwhile, if Heather notices herself getting stuck, it is best to say "stop" to herself, pause for a few seconds to clear her head, and start again. Also she needs to take things at a slower pace than she is accustomed to, as she probably still be a bit slowed (people tend to act at their habitual speed, even when their brain takes longer to catch up).

[Brians256]

Originally Posted by nexxo

The term you're looking for is "perseveration".

Thanks again, nexxo. It's been hard to memorize all the new vocabulary when I'm only catching it as part of a conversation. I now understand a bit of how computer newbies feel when they jump into conversations filled with terms like Dual-channel DDR, FSB, XP-SP1a, North Bridge, and such. I'm learning things like perseveration, ADL's, INR levels, and S-protein levels in the blood. I used to think I was smart, but the field of medicine really humbles me. So, either doctors either have a brain the size of a planet, or they are REALLY good at faking it.

[Jabo]

Wow, congratulations on Heather's miraculous recovery! and Happy Birthday to you mate!
She must be itching to get back to her usual self I bet
I keep repeating like a stuck record that she will be 100% fine, just give her time and all the love you got for her (long distance runs are the most difficult ones and things may get difficult for both of you later on but I am sure all will end up just fine).
Faith really DOES do wonders (you beliveing in her full recovery is better than all the therapy she'll ever recieve - your support is absolutely priceless BRian so keep it up m8! as you do all the time! )

Again, I am over the moon for all of you guys and keep up the good work!

[nexxo]

either doctors have a brain the size of a planet, or they are REALLY good at faking it.

They're really good at faking it.

Just kidding. But it's like any other expertise: we all know our own particular field really well. They do brain injury rehab, you do engineering. I'm not sure that most doctors (or I, for that matter) could keep up with you in a decent conversation on engineering...

[Stang_Man]

i'm sorry i am not up to date, but how is your wife Heather doing now?

[Etacovda]

All i can say after reading these 10 pages of posts, is Wow. The sheer intensity of what has happened here is amazing. The wonder of childbirth (for a forth time, congrats you verile man you ) to a terrible occurance of illness, to the amazing and truely humbling help of the online community of overclockers and hardware nuts that we all know we are, and finally to a recovery that is nothing short of spectacular. I know myself what it is like to see loved ones close to death and having to recover - thankfully, amazing recoveries run in my family also. A strong will is the best medicine anyone will ever have, and it seems obvious that both yourself and your wife have this.

I know that now more than ever you will appreciate everything in life, especially your family and wife. Also, from what you've replied here, your attitude is the exact right one; its truely humbling to behold how you've dealt with this tragedy. I think I speak for everyone here when I say that if anyone, anywhere, deserved the support you have recieved from this truely amazing community, it is you.

Ive never been so proud to be a part of the world overclocking/hardware community. It is truely humbling, and to be frank, this thread has made me cry.

God bless you Brian and Heather, and god bless this community.

[Brians256]

Thanks for asking!

Heather is doing better, for sure. She's going to go with me to the store to pick up some groceries while her sister stays at home with the kids. She's showing some emotion, too, although still not a lot. Her speech therapist says she's really improving, which is good. I guess that's because her working memory is getting better. I don't think the speech therapist tests short term memory or long-term memory (which she's doing not a lot better and still pretty good, respectively).

Anyway, it's still good to have her with me. We just need to get her ability to initiate actions more healed.

I'll probably start posting about other stuff than the stroke situation, because I'm sure that not everyone wants to hear about it. I'll probably start with another thread on my dirt-simple aluminum case but still keep updating this thread on occasion. That way, the other thread will be fore-front, but those who are interested will still be able to look at this on.

[#Rotor]

Originally Posted by Brians256

..... but those who are interested......

which basically includes every soul on the ship... and then some...


Glad to here things are looking up.

[MMZ_TimeLord]

/me huggles Heather and sends blessings upon her and all her family from all 330+ MMZs

Love to you...

[bigben2k]

Oh please do keep us posted!

Mighty glad to see things improving: I thought that the recovery would have taken much longer: it really looks promising!

[FoolOnTheHill]

Hey Brian,

I'm really glad to see that things are going better with Heater. It has been truly amazing to see the support that this great community has provided for you.

Unfortunately, I can sympathize with what it feels like to watch a loved one undergo a stroke. My grandfater, a few weeks ago, had a small stroke while he was at my high school production of Oklahoma. He was then carted off to the hospital for treatment. Although his case was much less severe than that of your wife, it was still scary to see him having trouble moving his right side, and having difficulty speaking. He's made a strong recovery so far, but his appetite is way down and he's having bad mood swings. All I know is, I look foreward to seeing every little bit of progress as it comes, from day to day, as I'm sure you do. I have a lot of respect for you, and the strength you've had to go through all this. I can only imagine, but now it seems like things are looking up, which is wonderful.

You'll all be in my prayers as well.

I think I speak for pretty much everyone here when I say that we want to keep hearing updates and keep supporting you as you continue.

[nexxo]

Good to hear your wife continues to make progress. Working memory takes a while to recover, more so because it is dependent on other cognitive variables such as attention/concentration, processing speed and fatigue, all of which are affected in a brain injury.

It is important to know that an injury to the lymbic system (of which basal ganglia are a part) can affect emotional expression as well as the experience of emotion in itself. This means that some people can experience the full range and depth of emotion they always could, but (the largely automatic processes of) expression may be affected. As such they may appear flat and distant, but this is not necessarily a reflection of what they are feeling inside.

Expression of emotion is also associated with "initiation". This is governed largely by the Cingulate Gyrus of the right-hand frontal lobe, which is very near the right-hand thalamic and lymbic system areas. If memory serves me this is where Heather sustained the largest injury.

Initiation should not be confused with motivation, although of course the latter is affected by the former. Initiation is the get-up-and-go impulse we experience when we engage in action, and also affects depth of cognitive processing (i.e. how well and thoroughly we think about things) and emotional expression. Without initiation we become passive, easily led and seem indifferent to things that we once felt strongly about.

This is why I said in the past that Heather feeling tearful and upset was a good thing. As long as she experiences strong feelings, she has a spark in there. Other things that affect emotion and initiation are of course fatigue and energy levels, and self-confidence. Don't underestimate how pummeled by life she must feel, and how insecure and vulnerable. Give her time and encouragement and it will start to come together.

[nexxo]

P.S. @ FoolOnTheHill: mood swings are not uncommon with left frontal (which is where your grandfather had the stroke, by the sounds of it) brain injury. Besides being in hospital never works well for anyone's mood. His mood should improve within the next three months. hang in there.

[mr_pina]

Found this in a link from a link, directly from a Portuguese forum, this is really world wide concern... i hope things have improved for Heather, i can see that its been a while since someone posted here.

best of wishes from me, may God be whith you in this time of need,
Ricardo, Portugal.

[Brians256]

Thank you, Mr. Pina. Things have definitely improved. Right now, Heather is playing with three of the kids without prompted or helped. That's a huge step! Being able to deal with multiple people at different levels is complicated stuff, or so the speech therapist says. She was able to go into a store today and pick out a gift for her Dad's wife (this is Mother's day in the US). So, she is recovering daily-living skills.

Thanks for all of your prayers and thoughts,
Brian

[dacooltech]

Brian I'm so happy to hear that Heather's back home. That's helluva Bday present Happy Bday BTW...
I'm sure Heather's miracolous improvements will continue, and she fully recovers soon...
and foogget'bout those pessimistic docs
-sorry NeXXo it goes only to those pessimistic docs

Hugs and kisses to the whole family

[Brians256]

Thanks Bruce!

This last Monday, she had an evaluation at a place called PRA (Progressive Rehabilitation Associates) where they spent all day running tests. Boy, that was intense! All kinds of stuff that you or I would say is simple (such as balance, word association, executive function (like planning a trip), remembering faces or instructions, etc..) had her exhausted by the end of the day. She was so tired that she threw up in the final interview! Thankfully, the MD (a physiatrist) was understanding and helped us clean up. I hope she can get into this program, but who knows? It's expensive and intensive, but I think it might help her out quite a bit more than the twice-weekly outpatient visits.

One other thing that I re-experienced there: other people have had it a LOT worse than Heather and I. It's amazing what some of those people have actually survived! One guy was driving a big cat (earth moving machine) and it fell backwards off of a cliff. His eye popped out, his skull was crushed in the front, and other "minor" injuries were inflicted. Another person fell 500 feet from a scaffold and had similarly bad injuries.

Heather is up, walking and talking and able to be evaluated by this program in only three months. These guys are just now being able to get to that level and they've been recovering for 2-3 years! Losing chunks of your brain does that to you.

[HAL-9000]

I just got done perusing through this thread...how horrible for you, and especially your sweetie Heather to have to deal with this!

The only experience I have had with a family member that remotely compares to this is from about seven years ago. My mother had a tooth infection, and hating dentists as she did, decided just to deal with the pain and not clue people in about her condition. Strange? Yes. But my mother is a unique person...

Well, my mom paid for her obstinance, the infection didn't go away, it went "septic" which means (as I was soon to learn) that the infection penetrated her bloodstream, through the root of her infected tooth in this instance. I also learned that is very bad, to say the least. My dad just happened to notice that my mom stopped breathing while they were watching TV and my mom had seemingly dozed off. He took her to the hospital thank God, and O2 deprivation from that "downtime" left my Mom in a coma for eleven days.

Seeing her in the hospital sucked. She was on a ventilator, and after she woke up, for another week and a half or so no one was "home." Metaphorically you could say the lights were on, TV, dishwasher running...but no one home so to speak. Just a blank stare into nothingness...we or the doctors didn't know how much of mom would "come back" after this. It really is a lottery I learned with recovery from injuries or damage to the brain. Every case is unique, and strange in its own way.

She did come back mostly, but now she's little bit slower, a little bit more "off," I don't know how to describe it. And now she is on a O2 bottle most of the time. But I am glad she is alive, she is my mother, she has been a awesome mom, and I love her dearly (sniff, sniff... ). I would much rather have her around being a little "off" than not at all! I am very lucky to not be telling this story with a much darker end. But from that experience, I think I can empthasize with your feelings about what your dealing with Brian256, but not your burden.

My dad can take care of my mom. He is a great companion for her, and he dearly loves her. As much as I hate to admit, it kinda lets me off the hook to go do my own thing, such as dwell on something that in comparison is so trivial, like how to shave 3C off my processor's temperature.

You don't have that option...three kids to feed and a fourth one thats newborn, which really means three MORE kids as far as labor to raise, a job, those Devil Spawned medical bills...and this site!? I don't know how you do it man! PROPS!

[psychofunk]

I don't know who you are but I do know that you are a father so I say congrats. It is the most wonderful thing that can happen to a person. It can be tuff sometimes but just remember that you can never take back words and you can never have the day back so make the most of them. The wonderful days of childhood will disappear quicker then the days of your life. May God bless you family and give you patience!

Edit: I just read more of this thread and realized that there were some complications with your wife. My prayers are with your family. Just remember that doctors don't know it all and that even the most dark of times can be overcome. I pray your wife recovers 100%.

[Mr. Thompson]

Hi Brian - We're still praying. Any updates?

Colin

[Brians256]

Well, not much change from the last update. Heather is still healthy and has had no more strokes, which is good. She is getting stronger and having more endurance, so she isn't sleeping as much during the day.

She had an MRI last Friday, which showed that the damage from the strokes is healing. But we still have a long way to go. Please pray that these things would improve: strength, endurance, memory, ability to act without being told, and her ability to have emotions.

Right now, we are all sharing the stomach flu, but at least that goes away quickly.